Something to Hang Onto

B"H
"Vatah ayef vyagea, vlo yira Elokim...." She paused and looked around the classroom, before continuing in her softly accented voice, "The Alter Rebbe explains this statement in the reverse; when you do not possess fear of G-d, you will become tired and weary. Someone who has faith and fear of G-d does not become exhausted by the struggles of life. Everything in their life comes from G-d. What comes from G-d doesn't tire you out, it exhilarates you."

What is the greatest struggle of my life?
My relationship with G-d. There have been good times, bad times, and extended periods of in-between times. I have been passionate and focused, secure in the knowledge that I was doing the 'right things' to maintain this relationship. I have felt distant and unworthy, having lost that sense of direction which guided me towards G-d. I have been indifferent, forgetting even my guilt in the miasma of trivialities that I had submerged myself in.
I am not alone in this struggle. I share it with the whole world. My struggle is unique only in that it is me struggling, this soul inside this body at this moment.
This week, I am content with my struggle. There are things in every day I wish to change or do better. That is the nature of struggle. But I feel confident. I feel secure.
What grants me this security?
"Someone who has faith and fear of G-d does not become exhausted by the struggles of life."
A prisoner is punished with work without purpose. A child is rewarded with love for any work they do.
I have faith in G-d that He values every moment of my struggle. On the days when I feel like I'm climbing a glass mountain with no end in sight, I know He is loving me for each time I reach forward and each time I fall.
My struggle to connect to Him cannot exhaust me as long as I know this.
How could it?