Things I've Learned This Week Or For Lack of A Better Title

Bsd

I have been home for nearly a week, and already I have learned so much! Perhaps this is the reason behind my mysterious silence? Simply that it takes great energy to process the amount of new information and life lessons that I have been receiving, leaving me with little, actually no, time to share it with my devoted readers. But now I feel I have somewhat recovered from this astounding influx of knowledge, and I will present a few of the things I have learned here, for your edification:

A - When removing a small child from the playground against his/her will, a prudent person will prepare themselves with aural protection, lest the ear-piercing, air raid siren imitating wail that will be produced by said small child prove damaging to one's audio functions.

B - If one wakes up, and then proceeds to continue to sleep, general society will not deem this an actual arising, despite one's own perception of consciousness.

C - Upon revisiting childhood impressions as impressed by certain popular novels (e.g. Ballet Shoes, Dancing Shoes, Movie Shoes, etc., or The Little Princess, Little Lord Fauntleroy, Cinderella, The Boxcar Children, Freckles, etc),one has decided that it is highly unlikely that one will either be "discovered" for remarkable talents in the performing arts arena, or that one will prove to be long-lost nobility and/or relatives of an important personage. As one was quite satisfied with one's family, one spent many hours singing or speaking to oneself in the hopes that someone might overhear and be stunned by one's talent. If one had only learned then what one learned this week....

D - Should sleep threaten to overcome one, one should not succumb to its tempting coils; rather, one should persevere in one's activities, be they of value or not, as long as one does not give in to the temptress of sleep. This is provided that the tempting of sleep occurs in the hours following sunset. Once dawn approaches, sleep no longer holds power, and one may - nay! should! - succumb with alacrity, and do all one can to preserve the state of slumber for as long as one dares.

E - Sand is very difficult to remove from one's shoes. However, removing one's shoes and accompanying footwear (if one's footwear extends past the knee, for example) in order to prevent sand accumulation may cause difficulties when attempting to exit the general area containing sand, or in other words, the playground.

F - When encountering individuals who are acquainted with one, if one should be of a certain age, certain recommendations or hopes will be expressed concerning one's marital state. It has been decided that the best course of action for one is the one presented in the classic film, Madagascar: "Smile and wave, boys, smile and wave." An adaptation of the aforementioned approach will prove satisfactory for all parties involved in any exchange concerning matrimony and one.

Having laid out for you as many lessons as days I have been home, I leave you, my dear Readers, with this last message:
G-d, IT'S GOOD TO BE HOME!!